Owl on the Prowl

Last night, I watched Dirty Dancing for the 54th time thanks to Netflix Watch Instantly.

Anyway, it reminded me of what my friend once told my husband about sex and Swayze. It has to do with the way Swayze makes love, lifting his woman, maybe pinning her to the wall and giving it to her with finesse. He said it makes your woman forget all her troubles, it makes her forget she is overweight or unattractive, it makes her forget that she is unemployed. It just makes her feel sexy and loved. So fellas, give it to your lady Swayze style tonight. She’ll really appreciate it.

When I become a mother, I am gonna be just like Roseanne Conner…poor, sarcastic but loving. I hope Todd will be like Dan.

Everyone who dressed up looked awesome. There was spandex, acid wash, Hawaiian prints, rock t-shirts, plaid and lots of sleeveless items. No one had a Nascar shirt or overalls and no males came shirtless (which is the trashiest thing you could do) but I was satisfied.

For food, I made Ro-tel and Velvetta dip, deviled eggs, tater tots, veggies with ranch (the most popular of dressings among southerners), weenies in grape jelly and bbq sauce (in the crock pot), jello shots and we bought some donuts. We have so much crappy beer and shots left over…

****Also exciting-In our hangover daze, we finally bought our honeymoon tickets to Berlin and Barcelona. I can’t fucking wait. If you have any info on either places, please email me.

Reg Presley of The Troggs….just check out these lyrics…

She’s my-yi-yi-yi gir-uuuurrrrrlllll

She’s my-yi-yi-yi gir-uuuurrrrrlllll

and i would kiss her…

and make love.

Last night these two women came up to me and asked for an LIT. I explained to them that I was not allowed to make those (just a rule. I know how to make them, I just can’t). So they replied, “well, what can you make?” as if LITs were the only mixed beverage known to man. I told them pretty much anything else. Then came the questions.

You got Alize? You got Ciroc? How much is Hennessey? How much are the beers? No. No. $10. $4-$8.

At this point, one of the ladies lost it saying that she was a barmaid and that this wasn’t a real bar. I had nothing to offer (even though we have over 50 different bottles of liquor), everything was too expensive (Hennessey IS expensive and this is NYC, lady. Our prices are actually pretty reasonable compared to other venues) and she wasn’t getting anything. She stormed off and minutes later I could still hear her pontificating about this crappy bar she was forced to deal with.

Since when is Alize a staple at a bar?

Last night I got on the L train after work and situated myself near the door, like I like to do. In comes this guy and basically pushes me out of my spot. So I says, I’m standing here. And he says to me ” I’M standing here. That’s what’s up.” So I proceed to call him a douchebag and sit down. He tells me that I should just sit and read my book and I should watch my back cause he might live on my block. OK… threats over a place to stand. Clearly this man is a psychopath. I gave him the finger.

This past week as been great for the Roth in regards to going to see some rock. Last Thursday, I got to go see Wanda. Even though I had no friend, I was tired and it was raining, I went down to my workplace to see her in action again. It wasn’t as good of a show as the one I worked last month, but that is only because Ms. Jackson had lost her voice. She was just as charming and adorable as ever so I was fine with it. She’s still Wanda Jackson, a legend.

Now I took some pictures of her with my good camera but I can’t seem to finish the roll off so you will have to suffer through my blurry camera phone shots (oh, the humanity…will someone get me a proper digital for shit like this??? or what I really want and have wanted for several years, A GODDAM LOMO LC-A? I should just fucking break down and buy one already).

Then, yesterday, I was hanging out with my friend Danise (pictured here) who was going to see Motorhead and I was super bummed/jealous

because I did not get a ticket. As we were sitting at the bar with Hank, her friend, Brian, who had gotten the tickets asked if I wanted to go. What a question, I know. Apparently, the girl who originally had the ticket, got wasted the night before and had been puking all day. Suffice to say, she was not feeling a metal concert. Sucks for her…actually, I should send her something nice. Anyway, I responded, “OF COURSE I WANNA GO. It’s LEMMY!!!!” (For those of you who don’t know me, I have a huge crush on Lemmy. I think he is mega hot and I don’t care about his moles.)

I proceeded to call the old curmudgeon and break the bad news. I think he was a little upset, but I gave him up to the minute texts with photos throughout the show. Bonus to going to see Motorhead was that I got see our old buds Valient Thorr.

Love these guys!! Beards, vests and venus. If you don’t know of them, check it out here. You know what I’m talkin’ about?!? Also, if you are aware of Valient Himself’s onstage moves, look for them in my heavy metal workout video (this will happen, people).

and here is Kilmister and Phil in a horribly blurry picture, with some goats. WHOOOO!